From Kayfaybe News
In keeping with a McMahon family tradition, a plump Gobbledy Gooker was ritualistically slaughtered today in preparation for the weekend’s Thanksgiving feast.
Family patriarch Vince McMahon gathered wife Linda and their two grown offspring, Shane and Stephanie, around a gothic altar in the family’s Connecticut mansion.
A Gobbledy Gooker — a large, rare, flightless subspecies of poultry that walks on two legs with a human-like gait — was then positioned on the altar, its head held by Shane McMahon on a chopping block.
The family then uttered in unison the ceremonial incantation: “Hatched at Survivor Series 1990, hatcheted tonight, for the greater good. Best for business. Hail Satan. Amen.”
Vince McMahon then swung a ceremonial sword (once belonging to The Berzerker) and beheaded the strange fowl, which then ran in circles for several moments to “sell” the fatal blow.
Meanwhile, at the T family household, Booker shucked a duck before roasting it for a nice dinner with live-in brother Stevie Ray.